Know your self worth and you will find contentment in life

Love the life you live. Live the life you love.

The tempo of the party gradually changed as people started speaking in high tones, as the volume of the music increased.  From where I was seated, for some reasons, my attention was fully focused on Connie.  And I smiled as I watched her chatting and laughing with different people in the room, and occasionally shaking her head in response to the music that was playing.  It was clear that she was having a good time.  A total transformation of the person I know for the past one and a half years.

“Hey!,” she said as she came to sit next to me.  “Are you enjoying yourself?”

And the chit-chat went on, until somewhere along our conversation, I told Connie how she seemed to have transformed from a shy and timid person who spoke very few words, to a bubbly and confident person.  “Yes, I am glad you have noticed,” she said wide-eyed with a lot of excitement.  “I got to know my self worth, which is the greatest gem in life!”

High self worth which is positive, comes from accepting yourself and admitting your mistakes by using them as a learning process.  Low self worth which is negative, comes from comparing yourself to others, and blaming yourself for things that are not your fault.  According to Connie, she changed her attitude and was able to shift from having a feeling of low self worth—to a high self worth.  How she did it:

  1. Seek to understand yourself by determining your values in life—the things that you believe are important in the way you live and work. Values are the measure you use to determine if your life is turning out the way you want. Doing this will help you to accept yourself.  Connie made a decision to only pursue what is beneficial and joyful to her life, and she stopped feeling unworthy.  She also stopped comparing herself with others, because her values enabled her to accept the fact that there will always be someone who is better than her in life.  This also led her to be kind to herself, and to focus more on what she does well, and not what others do better than her.
  2. Seek to understand those you interact with closely by paying attention to their choice of words and actions.  To know people’s thoughts listen to their words, and to know their hearts, look at their actions.  By doing this you will get to know your place by setting healthy boundaries.  It also helps you to understand that the way people treat you has nothing to do with you, but everything to do with how they feel within themselves.  Otherwise, how do you explain when a stranger in the supermarket suddenly becomes rude to you, yet the two of you are meeting for the first time.  Or when a total stranger stops to help a beggar in the streets.  By seeking to understand the people she interacted with, Connie was able to know her self worth and stopped focusing on how she felt about others, but instead, on what she deserves in life.
  3. Do something because it is the right thing to do, and not because you want recognition. This will help you to continually be calm and feel uplifted, which in turn will enable you to stop feeling constantly angry or frustrated when your expectations are not met.  Connie let go of thoughts that did not allow her mind to move forward, by selecting her thoughts the same way she selected her clothes.  By thinking positive and being positive, positive things started happening in her life.